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Whoop whoop!
Of course, I'm stressed about the paperwork now. There's always things to do and too little time to do them.
Of course, I'm stressed about the paperwork now. There's always things to do and too little time to do them.
Engaged!
Since I moved home, life has been pretty great. I haven't been writing much, not even journaling much, because I've been keeping busy and dating a wonderful man. He has been supportive of me since I was a teenager in high school. He has never disappointed me and he has always shown up for me. Unfortunately timing just wasn't our thing. I wasn't ready to date someone two years older than me when we were young and then one or both of us were in relationships from that point onwards. And I think if we hadn't taken the paths we did, we wouldn't have grown into the people we are. We just know how to be there for each other. If I was religious I'd believe that God had this planned all along, but I'm not religious. We know the terrible sides of each other and the beautiful sides of each other and we're good with both. I don't care if he leaves Kleenex or paper towels on his night stand. Last Sunday he helped me wash moldy dishes. I'm excited to get to live with him and I am happy. I'd heard
Depression Again
Hey, It's been a while. I tried writing in my journal but that served to make me feel worse. The same thoughts rattling around in my head. So I figured I would write something here instead. I thought maybe I might add more to my psychosis story. I had this idea about how to write it a couple of months ago but maybe I was still a little manic then. I think I wanted to write it to help understand my manic episode, but there wasn't that much to it. I was crazy and now I'm not. I think it still bothers me that I went crazy. I sleep twelve hours a day now. I have no friends in this area and I feel like I'm not supposed to go outside to help slow the spread of coronavirus. I walk Rosie a couple of times a day. I play animal crossing. I just don't enjoy being alive very much right now and that sucks ass. The apartment I share with my boyfriend is smaller than the one we had previously and we had to get rid of some of our furniture in order to move and so we don't have room for all of the
Not Doing Well
Hello All, I am not doing well. I have been manic all week. My phone is broken because I dropped it too many times. I have ordered a cheap $60 phone replacement because I'm tired of dropping my phone and breaking it. I stopped playing pokemon go because of that, and I've gone on less walks since. COVID-19 breaking out has not helped either. I hate my job. I feel I am permanently destined to hate my job. I am so comfortable with having defined roles and goals and benchmarks that having no direction is driving me insane. I fucking hate it and feel like my bosses are some of the least incompetent people I have ever worked with. They are not the worst bosses I have ever had, but they are terrible at managing resources. Being better than SM is not a very high bar to pass. Do I just have incredibly bad luck? Is my outlook on life awful? Do I just have to create my own goals for myself? Idk maybe? I'm also incredibly sick of the medical field's stigma against cannabis. SO FUCKING SICK OF
Calmer Place
Okay, so...I had a phone interview today, which was very exciting.
I noted that I have a lot less anger at the general world than I did with my last long job search. I know that there are opportunities and I know that I have to work on being a competitive candidate if I want my dream job, and I've gotta be patient, and I have to be a little open to the world molding me. I have more patience for recycled interview questions and realize the importance of good answers a bit better and what companies are really asking. I mean, it's like how it bothered me that the last place I interviewed at didn't have a company website. A company wants to see
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